Join me in Snarkville

Being snarky is the only thing that makes this place enjoyable. After all, if you can't laugh at others, how do you feel superior?

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Location: Snarkville, Left Coast

Treat me no differently than you would any Queen. I rule my Snarky kingdom with some kind of dignity, but I refuse to add grace. I rule with my Prince of a husband (he can't be King, since he married into his royal title) and my son the Duke of Snarkville.

Friday, June 02, 2006

Off the Ship and onto Club Med

Before you start thinking "WOW, she has the life. Cruising and Club Med all in one vacation." Let me paint for you a picture.

My day began at the crack of 7am. Get up; get dressed; get off the damn ship. Then drive two and a half hours north (in traffic) to Club Med. Now is it just me, or do we think Club Med is supposed to be a high end luxury resort? Let's put it this way -- I hope the Club Med in Florida is not an example of their offering. Let's review how my impression and reality are so NOT connected:

Impression:
Club Med rooms will be large and posh. There will be first class service in regards to the rooms -- like my bags will be brought inside my room; there will be turn-down service; the lights will work; and everything will be clean and comfortable.

Reality:
The room is basically clean. While it feels like it was rode hard and put up wet, it is actually clean. The room's best feature is the HUGE closet. Yup, the closet could be a nanny room in most European countries. I'm still not sure why, but it is huge. The furnishings went out of style while I was in high school -- and yes, I know I'm not marrying the bedspreads, but updated styles is one of the things that shows a resort cares to keep up. Thus far we have not been turned down, so I'm doubting this is happening. When we checked in our bags were dropped off in front of our room, not brought in at all. And there seems to be a master switch (or in our room two switches), that have to be in a certain position to make any of the lights work. URGH.

Impression:
Club Med, being a world class resort, would have world class food. There would be service that would include people coming to your table to bring you food. There would be choices that would include a few things not normally in my diet, but on the most part fabulous dishes. It would have been like a cruise ship on land.

Reality:
There is a buffet. Your Queen does NOT enjoy buffets. I find that food sits too long, it is often over cooked, and if I'm going out to eat -- I want to be served DAMN IT. Yes, I'm a snob -- but come to find out there are 300 other travel agents here who feel the EXACT same way.

So, Duke is living the high life at the Queen Mum's and I'm jealous. But tomorrow we have classes -- there's been more FREE stuff, thus far -- so I'm thrilled -- what? You can't tell? Go figure.

On to other brief news:
I have not been knitting. Perhaps this has something to do with my foul mood. However on Freedom of the Seas, we were running all over the ship (literally. We did the Ultimate Race -- sort of an Amazing Race on the ship. We ran from one end to the other MULTIPLE TIMES. Prince did the flowrider AND the rock climbing wall. I got to ice skate. We came in 4th of 16 teams. We are proud. My inner thighs HATE me from climbing 14 flights of stairs up and down). And frankly, I'm too hot to pick up my wool. I would rather not sweat all over my handwork. So, either we find A/C or I'll be knitting on the plane ride home.

4 Comments:

Blogger Sarah said...

Man, I would have thought Club Med was fancier than just a buffet & tired room.

7:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree - when I think Club Med, I think the epitome of luxury. I would be underimpressed as well. When I'm on vacation at a resort (like I've ever done that!), I want someone bringing me drinks, food, peeling me a grape, you name it. My wish is their command sort of thing. I guess that's what hanging out with the Queen has done to me!

Sorry you're not up to knitting, but the Ultimate Race thing sounds cool. And why exactly did YOU ice skate and not the Prince? I would have thought that was right up his alley!

7:46 AM  
Blogger Nic said...

Seriously, you are complaining about your troubled life of cruises and club meds. I refuse to humor you and be ohhh poor baby had to eat from the buffet and not off a menu.

5:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It is not snobby to want to be served food freshly cooked off of a menu. If you wanted buffets, you could have gone to Vegas. It's closer.

Work is hectic now. I'll send your first package in a few days when things settle down.

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8:04 AM  

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